WARNING: To those of a delicate disposition, the following story might be a bit much to bear. Please treat this text as an essential cautionary tale. If you want to avoid seeing the upcoming grizzly images, just squint your eyes a little—you'll be just fine. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
Take a close look at the image below. This very well might be the best $30 you will ever invest in your musical setup. Sure, a classic wah-wah pedal is an absolute winner, an overdrive pedal like a Tube Screamer sounds incredible, a Fender Twin is a legendary amplifier, and those handy little Snark headstock tuners are wonderfully neat. Capos? Absolutely—they are invaluable tools. But none of that premium gear is of much use to you without a structurally sound guitar to play them through.
The Scene of the Crime
Now, let me paint a picture for you. Imagine hosting a dinner party at your place. All of your closest mates are over, you've cracked open a few bottles of fantastic wine, and everyone is having a brilliant time. The main course you prepared was a triumph, and your homemade crème brûlée was completely out of this world.
Naturally, the conversation shifts your way: "So, how are the guitar lessons going, John*?" (*Name changed to protect the heartbroken).
"Pretty good!" John replies. "I'm really enjoying the practice, and Simon's lessons are a lot of fun."
"Go on then, pull out the guitar and give us a tune!"
John smiles, grabs his instrument, and launches into a fantastic rendition of Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here." Before long, the entire room is singing along in perfect harmony. John is feeling absolutely on top of the world—not only has he completely smashed it in the kitchen, but he is officially a verified Guitar God in the eyes of his peers.
The Fatal Mistake
Song finished, John stands up to head back into the kitchen to grab another bottle of wine. He carefully sets his guitar down on a dining chair. He places the base of the body flat on the seat cushions and leans the delicate neck against the wooden backrest. It looks sturdy enough. It looks safe.
On his way back from the kitchen carrying a premium, Halliday-rated Shiraz... there is a sudden, echoing, catastrophic CRASH.
Yep. You guessed it.
Why "The Chair Lean" is a Structural Nightmare
When a guitar is balanced precariously against furniture, it takes almost nothing to cause a disaster. A slight vibration from someone walking past, a slipping strap, or a top-heavy tilt will send it tumbling forward or sideways.
Because of the way wood grain runs through a guitar neck—especially on instruments with angled headstocks like Gibsons or certain acoustics—hitting the floor at an angle creates a massive amount of whip-like tension. The result is almost always a clean snap right across the headstock joint or a fractured neck heel. A repair like that will cost you hundreds of dollars at a luthier, and the instrument will never truly be the same again.
The Inevitable Aftermath
I will put the upcoming post-crash photos in exact order of "ouch." If you need to shield your eyes, please look away now. And let this be your permanent reminder to go out and buy a proper stand before your next practice session.
Keep your gear safe, folks. If you need any advice on setting up your practice space safely or want to book in your next session, feel free to explore my private guitar lessons and coaching resources.
Cheers,
Simon
Ready to start playing?
Call or email to book your first lesson. Let me know your preferred days and times and I'll get back to you quickly.
$125 / hr incl. GST · In-person Petersham or online · Adults 18+

